Shhh!

I've spent the better part of my day at the library down the street from my house doing some work and non-work related things. The couple I speak about in the following rant plunked themselved down in front of me about an hour ago....

Okay, I get that the library is a public place but for the love of all things good in this world what makes you think that you can sit RIGHT across from me and have a loud chitty-chat conversation when I am clearly trying to get some effing work done!? Perhaps going to a cafe where you can chat freely or maybe MOVE THE FUCK AWAY from me so that I can do my work in peace and not listen to your assinine conversation about Germany and children and FUCKING ROOT BEER!!

Seriously, can you please go somewhere else if you're going to chat? Please?
I don’t want to hear about your cat or dog or the way your cat and dog get along and how cute it is that they think they’re people. Some of us still believe in the sanctity of the Library and the quiet and peace and learning that used to come with it. For some of us, the Library is our Church. Please don’t shit on my hymnal and don’t talk over the sermon.

Or how about learning some basic manners? How about that? Be aware of your surroundings and not think that you are the only two people on the planet. I mean, for the love of god dude, clearly she thinks of you just as a friend, can you not see the crossed arms, the lean back to her body, the hunched shoulders? You can lean in all you want with your open arms and your laid back attitude but she’s not going to fuck you. Sorry.

Ha. That made me feel much better. I only wish that the keys of my computer were louder so that I could type my 60 wpm and interrupt your OH SO IMPORTANT conversation with clickity-clackity-clickity-click. And if I had long nails to type on said keyboard with, well that would be all the better.

Seriously, shut the fuck up. Now you're bothering the people two tables down. How completely oblivious are you to your surroundings? Shut up.

And that's the end of my rant. I am pretty cranky today and I suppose I could have asked them to please move but then again I think that if the tables were turned I would have moved away. But that's just me.